I May Have a Heart of Glass, But You Have a Heart of Steel
by Scared of Scars
Summary: To sum up Allison and Logan's relationship in one word would be: COMPLICATED. After Jean Grey's death Logan needs to decide if he is still in love with her or if he will move on and stop comparing people to her. Will Allison and Logan's friendship develop into something more or will they remain being 'Just Friends? ONESHOT


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Have you ever remembered a specific moment of time? Clear as day, it blazes through your mind like a wildfire, feeding on more memories to survive. Even when you think it's over, a few more rise from the ashes for a final farewell.  
It can happen while you're fighting with you bed for sleep. Or while day dreaming –people don't burst out into spontaneous laughter for nothing. There is also the possibility you are like myself and you get a blast from the past while you're deep in thought.

It's never the same scene twice. No chronological order, but they have a similar theme (or character) to each sequence of the movie reel.

Contemplating this, I walked through the maple archway inside. The mansion fit the definition of a peaceful environment –you could lose yourself subconsciously and find your way back without being bothered once in the various hallways. Fighting was frowned upon. Ironically, my thoughts swirled around in agitation, like a maelstrom, the phenomenon feared most by sailors. Arguments were prominent.

.:.:.:.:.

_"Allison is capable of generating an electric current around herself, another layer of skin technically. Touch her while the defenses are up and you receive taser-like symptoms depending on the voltage. Her powers can emanate to others as well. She could possibly produced bolts of energy, but the Professor hasn't reached a plausible way for her to control that power yet without someone getting hurt," Jean explained to Logan._

_Everything in my world was black. I had to play the role of the unconscious patient to avoid Jean's intrusive poking of the body and prodding of the mind._

_Why was I here? I was stabbed in the heart last night. Literally, not figuratively. Okay, okay, I might be dramatically enhancing the extent of my wounds. Logan didn't puncture cardiac tissue –not even close. His claws penetrated the right side of my chest. He got an unexpected jolt of electricity though –not good for a man made of metal._

_Silence followed Jean's statement and the clicking of her shoes could be heard as she exited._

_"You didn't tell me you could electrocute people," Logan whispered to himself._

_"You didn't tell me you had claws," I stated._

_"You never asked," he retorted._

_"Didn't stop it from hurting like hell."_

_A smirk grew, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger," Logan responded brashly._

.:.:.:.:.

I chuckled. The movement and sound seemed foreign. Any laughter peeled, was strewn like a bad apple; the atmosphere didn't need it. Lately all happiness was hidden behind the walls, waiting until the mourning finished. Things would have mulled over easier if the Professor wasn't six feet under.

My short lived grin receded, only proceeding because of how far Logan and I had come from that moment. The memory was ancient –too many harmless giggles since then. A couple months after the harmless argument was where I cannon-balled next.

.:.:.:.:.

_"Hey Sparky, come over here for a sec," Logan called to me, like a dog._

_Why he insisted on calling me that, I didn't know. Logan was quite the character, but you never knew what he was going to throw at you next. Learning to gage the intensity of my answer by what name her called me, I continued on. "Do I walk around calling you Metal-head all day?" I asked with a playful glare that warmed into a smile at the deliberate shake of Logan's head._

_"Didn't think so," I said._

_Logan took the liberty of nick-naming everyone whom he spoke with. "Kiddo" became the general name he used for those he barely knew or had just met. Each reaction to it helped him choose what to call that person in later meetings. If he came up with a witty "pet name", Logan felt cocky when he used it or he just didn't like you. Regular names or formal titles meant respect. But no matter the name, Logan still kept his arrogant manner and treated people around him equally –with the exception of Scott._

_"Calm down, the Professor wouldn't want you to short circuit," he teased._

_I gently shoved him. "Sometimes I wish I would have electrocuted you longer, this happens to be one of those moments."_

_"Relax; I just need to get you to Xavier. He wants to speak with you," Logan said._

_I fell into stride beside him. We followed the familiar lacquered walls through the school. It was one more turn to the Professor's office._

_Something bad has happened, I thought. The Professor usually had casual conversations with everyone while he roamed the halls. If you were called to his office, he wanted to catch you up to speed on Magneto's plans or you had gotten into shit._

_My face tightened, rigid shoulders stiffened, and my hands wrung themselves out of habit. Don't stress over the unknown, I chanted silently._

_Logan glanced over at me. Concern washed over his features. And Unexpectantly, He swung an arm in front my chest, blocking me from a group of kids._

_"Danger kids, high voltage," he told them, winking at me. He was being a smart-aleck again._

_Horrified eyes stared at me, waiting for some kind of explosion. It only took seconds for the five bodies to flee from sight, leaving nothing but dust. Giggles escaped my mouth - Logan always knew how to break the ice._

_"There's no need to worry Allison," Xavier's voice evaded my thoughts. And in some way he was right._

_Logan looked over his shoulder, a grin accenting his face. He had only wanted to see me smile._

.:.:.:.:.

How could I have forgotten a smile like that? Genuine and pure happiness seeped through the edges, captivating his eyes. Something rarely seen on Logan. It looked good.

Days became brighter and my nights more restless. Logan's smile was the ecstasy fueling my wildest fantasies. He kept me up till three in the morning and he was oblivious to it. What I didn't know, was that I had the same effect on him.

.:.:.:.:.

_Rain. It had the ability to wash away anything. The blood of war's evil actions. Silly chalk drawings created by a young child too. Rain could pelt down, melting the faux mask of a hurting woman or reveal the ugliest deceptions. Today, it chose to bring two people together._

_Logan and I were hiding from the rain beneath the green foliage of trees. It didn't look like the water was going to let up, so we sat in the grass. During this time, I had told him my theory. He only laughed._

_"You are intolerable," I growled._

_"You got that right."_

_Fury bolted through me, why wasn't he putting up a fight? "I want to hit you," I stated._

_"Can't let you do that babe. You'd electrocute me," he was smiling as he spoke._

_A distorted sound - the mixture of a shriek and a groan- scratched my throat. My back turned to him and I stormed off. I couldn't believe he was laughing at me! Even whenever I was angry!_

_Rain soaked my clothes. Logan called to me. He caught up quickly. "Allison, what do you want me to say? Hit me?" he asked, growing irate as well._

_Water trickled down his nose, dropping off the tip. Beads of clear liquid stuck to his lips._

_I admired what the water did to his features. And slowly my livid nature dispersed. The rain had stole away my anger._

_"I want you to say you love me," I told Logan._

_He shook his head, "I have a better way."_

_And then he kissed me._

.:.:.:.:.

My fingers grazed over my lips. I remembered my lips feeling swollen afterwards. We had kissed for so long.

Tears formed afterwards. Our paradise didn't last long.

.:.:.:.:.

_"Why can't you admit you love her?!" I yelled._

_"Because I don't!" He yelled back._

_Face to face. That's how it always was whenever Jean smuggled her way into our relationship and our arguments. We both knew it was a lie. Logan had always been in love with Jean. He never admitted it, because if he did, I would be gone._

_I guess the only reason we had gotten together was because she had sacrificed herself to save the team in Canada. He knew she was gone. I happened to be second best._

_I made him happy in the short time we formed a romance. I cleaned up the pieces of his broken heart. I was his shoulder to cry on, his confidante. Until Jean resurrected herself from the dead._

_Two weeks since her return, Logan and I constantly argued. Over small things like what we were going to do during the day. Or over big things involving Jean._

_"Logan, can't you see? In your eyes I will always be compared to Jean. I won't be my own person; I will never be able to escape her shadow."_

.:.:.:.:.

I had fled. Like a coward. I was scared to face the facts, because I was madly in love with him. I still am. Through thick and thin, we've been pals. And to not be, is a hard concept to grasp. Even when the truth was forced upon me –Logan was torn between me and Jean- I still wanted to believe that he would choose me over her.

I never got my answer.

The X-Men went to battle that night, to save a mutant from the death grip of Magneto. In the battlefield, I unleashed my anger on the pitiless pawns of the enemy. Bolts of lighting escaped my palms through the power of my blind rage. And when it was all over, I didn't regret one moment of their pain. I wanted those mutants to cringe at the sight of me, run in fear of being harmed; I needed them to feel my pain.

Reality eventually sunk in. I couldn't do anything if Logan didn't want me. Hurting individuals wouldn't help. Hopefully there would be a therapy for my situation. Romantic movies and ice cream maybe?

I glanced out the window. Foot steps sounded behind me. I turned around. My breath caught in my throat. My eyes took him in, was this an illusion?

He ran up to me, gathering my body in his arms.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

And I believed him.

**Thanks so much for reading! Please review and tell me what you think! If you liked it then take a look at my Batman story and my LOTR oneshot. **

**-Cece**


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